Day 9’s window is pretty small, and dare I say it, bullet shaped? But it’s not my turn to open, so I hand the calendar to my husband, who very carefully (so as not to disturb window 12 located precariously above) opens the window to reveal….

“Wait, what is that?!” he exclaims, peering at the small piece of jeweled metal. “Oh wow, I know what that is!” I say, “It’s a clit clamp!” I can’t help the look of horror from spreading across my face. Clit clamps have always freaked me out a little. My clit is such a sensitive little being, the idea of clamping it does not appeal to me at all. However, in the spirit of the month of sexual happiness, I’m willing to jump firmly out of my comfort zone and into the (hopefully not too uncomfortable) world of clit clamps!

It helps that the clamp is so pretty looking. It’s made of a silver metal with two lovely red beads dangling at the bottom of it, which will look pretty next to my vulva. I can move the two metal clasps apart slightly, but it’s pretty rigid and easily snaps back into place, whatever happens this is going to be a very tight fit.

I actually have no idea how to position the clit clamp properly. Luckily I live in the 21st century and google KNOWS EVERYTHING. I did a quick image search and found out the very top of the clit sits in the top loop (as I expected) and the long bits go either side, ending outside of the labia. I’m still thinking “ouch” when I imagine this on myself. As it’s a bit of a limit for me, and I’m used to being the sexually explorative one and giving my partner more sexaul confidence, I decide I happiest going it alone today.

My first attempted was a failure. I scooted up to my mirror so I could see what was going on properly. My first thought was ” aw my pussy is pretty!”, it truly is a lovely looking vulva to me. Then I tried a few times to get the clamp on. I pulled the bottom arms apart as far as I could and put them either sides of my clit, then I tried to side the clit downwards. That’s when it hurt, I kind of thought my clit would suddenly be free once it was in the loop part but I soon realised the feeling was waaay too intense for me to get there.

So I stopped, put my pants back on, and went by to my trusty internet friend for some help, this time in the format of Twitter.

Thankfully, some kind hearted tweeters gave me some top tips and reassured me I didn’t have to get the clamp to slide all the way down, like I’ve seen in the images and a few porn vids. Armed with this knowledge I set off to have another go. I slide the clamp on so that just the lowest part of it clips around my clit. It feels tight and intense but not painful. I grab a trusty bullet and a bit of lube. I tease my clit to successful and explosive orgasm. I’ve got to say my orgasm was really intense, but I’m not sure if this was due to the clamp or just a placebo effect. Hmm, more experimentation will commence over the next few months!