This post is hard to write for an audience. It’s so painfully personal I don’t think it’ll even make it on to my twitter feed. It’s a journey I started a while ago, but with the turn of a new year and some serious self reflection, I’ve decided to share it with you. It’s funny, how some things I struggle to say out loud, but I’m brave enough to share with a thousand strangers on the internet. Anonymity is a powerful thing.
The truth is I spent many, many years resenting my body. Surrounded by images of slim, smooth, hair free and flaw free women, I couldn’t help but feel ugly. Particularly in a sexual context. Even now, I keep hearing, over and over again, about how body hair on women is “disgusting” and “dirty” (the last time I heard this was yesterday, thank LH forum). In the past it would make me hate myself. In the present it makes me angry at the harmful people who keep on saying it.
I’m pleased to let you know that I no longer hate my body. I worked really really hard at loving it. Bit by bit. I took it in and really looked until I saw the beauty. It all started with my thighs. I’d put on a lot of weight and my thighs were bigger. They’ve always had stretch marks. I just looked at them one day in the shower and decided that I really like my thighs. I just smiled and said that to myself. And it was true.
So now I’m taking on the rest of my body, piece by piece. I’m so nervous to share these images with you, but I hope it’ll encourage more people to love their body. Each image will have a few words describing what I see when I look at it, or how I feel about it. Warning: Although the images are not sexual, I will be naked in all of them. If exposed skin offends you, don’t click the links to look at the image. If you subscribe and you don’t want to see them, all posts will start with “Image:”, so if you see this in the subject line of the email alert about a new post from MissJezebella.com, simply delete the email without opening it.
I’ll post a new images as and when the mood takes me. In the meantime, I’ll remain happy and comfortable in my un sexy body.